The Vigil Idiot: Ek Tha Tiger

August 17, 2012 8:01 am by

I’ll be honest. It’s kinda silly to go into a Salman Khan film expecting logic. Just give us two hours of the man on screen, and people will be entertained. Director Kabir Khan, however, decided to go another way and tried to make a sane film that required our superstar to *shudder* act. And when you make Salman Khan (who plays RAW agent Tiger) and Katrina Kaif (playing rival ISI agent Zoya) do that, the results can be, well, iffy.




Sahil Rizwan is a 24-year-old freelance writer and creator of The Vigil Idiot. When he’s not busy doing everything in his power to avoid taking up a 9-to-5 desk job, you can probably find him curled up in front of a TV or his laptop. You can follow him on Twitter and Facebook.

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Comments (85)

  1. Bharti |

    sidesplitting!!!
    … and waaaayyy better than actually watching it

  2. Arnava |

    Sir, You are a legend.. Now I can laugh at all stupid bollywood movies without even watching them.. That’s a lot of money and time saved… Thank you for your blogs..

  3. i din’t watch movie but i see you blog it is nice thank to share this awesome!

  4. Saifur |

    LOL. This was fun reading. Damn woh last walla bike action scene ka koi joke tha toh this comic strip is the complete maal! We’ll regardless loved it. keep up the awesome work!

  5. preeti |

    super fun!!

  6. LOL! I can’t believe there are people on here who are actually defending the movie. Yes, there are people so infatuated with Salman Khan, that they defend the movie against a satirist!

  7. Amrutha |

    Catching up with all the old reviews. “Ae chal take na” was hilarious!!! :D

  8. Virag Padalkar |

    Lol. Really liked the spoof. I look forward to bad movies being released only so I can read them being panned by you. ROFLMAO re Bhavika Sicka’s comment too (manboobs in her face. Good one. And amen re eyebags).

    Sahil Rizwan – Keep up the good work bro. Kudos.

  9. Gowtham |

    Awesome reviews.. Keep them coming.. Loved it..

  10. Kinshuk |

    It’s not about how good the movie was or how perfectly every aspect has been covered in the comic strip. The beauty is in presenting the big picture in such a hilarious way. And I am pretty sure, with the talent Sahil has, he can do this to to any damn movie in this world no matter how perfectly it has been written. Kudos Bro !!! Keep up the good work :)

  11. KK |

    Sahil Rizwan is the guy who we should be laughing at.

    First: scientific research is progressive, and so it was necessary to get close to the professor for long periods of time to find hints for the ISI to try and figure out how to obtain the technology.

    Second: The ISI and RAW is still looking for Tiger and Zoya at the end. Their files have NOT been deleted. So his point is irrelevant.

  12. RS |

    “Ae chal! Take na!” was the best!!!

  13. chill |

    Its not that bad a movie OR plot. There surely was a plot to the whole thing.

  14. Aastha |

    What else were we expecting out of a Salman Khan movie?

    He spends no money, has shitloads of clothes AND the government of India won’t ask him why he was buying stuff for a girl when he’s supposed to be keeping an eye on the scientist?

    But then, as someone said here, “u all don”t know what can bhai do he is the TIGER”

    LOL.

  15. Richa |

    I wonder y people go watch these movies. If u think katrina has “deadpan constipated look” and u dont have a special liking for salman’s “manboobs” y take pains and watch a movie in the second row!!

    I agree with the very first line! Dont go watch such movies if you are looking for some logic.

    And man! Sahil! This is awesome stuff. I left my mind at home so did not really notice all these loopholes that the film had. Crazy observation! I guess am gonna read all the “vigil idiot”s now (whether I watch the movie or not). Watevs, YO!! :D

  16. kk |

    Awesome………it was the mos pathetic movie i had ever seen in my life……..

  17. Priyanka |

    Awesome!! :)

  18. Jatin |

    Dude you’re one awesome son of a mother!! Brilliant stuff..am a fan!! Keep ‘em coming!!

  19. Chandra |

    Excellent and Hilarious stuff!!
    And guess what? That 38 degree mind-torturing crap made 307 crores to become 2nd highest grossing Bollywood movie!! Incredible India!!

  20. george |

    awesome !!
    intelligent … super hilarious
    btw u can never to be too careful while creating a plot :)

  21. TONY |

    …. and after all this it made 300 crores… how… Blame the people who went and wasted 300 crores on this…

  22. Teja |

    your usage of ‘Louv’ and ‘Louw’ are quite funny… thoroughly enjoyable reads… your reviews are….

  23. *Ae chal! Take na!*

    you’re back in the game with that one strip! :D

  24. muttherchutt |

    Internet bandwidth saved.

  25. HashRandom |

    Aah.. $13 saved..!

  26. vicky |

    u all don”t know what can bhai do he is the TIGER

  27. Bhavika Sicka |

    You, Sir, are a genius.
    Just went through your comic spoof on Ek Tha Tiger, and I’m still clutching my sides laughing.
    It was the most plotless, senseless, inane, hackneyed, ghisa pita, nonsensical film mainstream Bollywood has churned out in a long time; a failed attempt at crossing The Tourist and Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
    Katrina, as usual, had her deadpan constipated look on, even when she was ‘kicking butt’ Lara Croft style, and Salman Khan’s manboobs were in my face (since I had managed to land a seat in the second row). :|
    Your comic strip was truly a brilliant take on the film!
    It’s nice to know that there are more people on the same page as me, who believe Salmaan needs to visit a cosmetic surgeon to fix his under-eye bags rather than torment us with this ludicrosity on screen.
    Keep it up; looking forward to more such awesome stuff! :)

  28. Santosh |

    first of all…where is like button

    Tiger ki 8 years ki salary bas 25 lacks thi…itna bda agent or salary 3 lacks per annum

  29. Rakshita |

    Lol! Superb! I wonder what happened to the actual mission! The scientist who Sallu was supposed to chase! :P

  30. Atul |

    Ek tha Tiger was a complete disappointmnet for a spy movie…it was a Romantic movie…and i agree with Sahil…pathetic SPY MOVIE…

  31. ND |

    Well, some are plot holes, some are not.

    o She does not give Tiger’s disguise as she is not sure what disguise he would come up with. She can get away with that saying she has not seen his new passport.

    o They want to capture Tiger in Kazakhsthan as maybe it is easier to kidnap/move him around there without raising suspicions.

    o They don’t have a lot of money and need to find work to blend in so she starts working as a dance instructor as she is a dancer.

    o She is not an ISI agent who is working as a director/dancer as a cover. She is an artist who ISI has employed to snoop on the professor.

  32. Akanksha |

    Correction – Zoya doesn’t invite him to her own hostel room but that of a freind’s and charge him 100 euros for the same.

  33. Saurabh Mehra |

    Great going Sahil. Mother of Bhen really cracked me up.

  34. Saurabh Mehra |

    @Person-above-me-who-don’t-give-a-damn-about-gaping-plot-holes

    If just pure entertainment was what I sought, I’d have watched Singham or Dabangg or any of the dozen or so movies that don’t take themselves seriously while trying to peddle a retarded story-line posing as a spy drama.

    It’s not ‘intellectualizing’. It is refusing to watch my intelligence being treated as tissue paper for Salman Khan’s ego.

  35. Indy |

    You can’t intellectualize everything. It was a very entertaining film. Loved the movie!

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