‘Koffee With Karan’ Recap: Sonam and Deepika

November 22, 2010 2:06 pm by

One big happy family.

As we pointed out in last week’s recap, there’s something fishy about two known Bollywood frenemies pretending to be buds on Koffee With Karan. But that’s exactly what Deepika Padukone and Sonam Kapoor did last night, casting aside their differences to bond over bashing Ranbir Kapoor and other Bollywood peeps. In our recap of episodes of season three of Koffee With Karan, we sniff out the bullshit factor, rating it on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being a crock o’ Leprechaun gold, and 1 being honest-to-God sainthood.

Deepika and Sonam Are Friends
Muhahaha. In short, we’re not buying it, and neither are Sonam and Deepika. Bless her diplomatic soul, but whoever told Deepika to take the gallant high road clearly forgot to issue the same instructions to Sonam. Deepika did her best to insist the duo were friends with faint platitudes that were almost entirely and gleefully undone by a giggling Sonam who spent much of the night throwing tact and diplomacy to the wind. After Sonam praised Deepika for “hanging” onto Ranbir (girl speak for “it’s amazing your clingy desperation didn’t drive him away after month two”), Deepika looked resigned to the fact that there would be no subsequent exchanges of Diwali gifts or trips to the spa.

By the end, the two were clearly over the whole “fr” part of frenemy, ranking each other second last for acting ability, and looking sufficiently pained when college students voiced their opinion on their sex appeal and fashion chops (Deepika won the first; Sonam the second). Sonam’s crowning insult came well into the rapid-fire round after she trashed all of Bollywood for having an atrocious sense of style (or as she eloquently put it: “They all suck”), and only making a lame backtrack after K-Jo pointed to Deepika. “Oh not you,” she giggled, before adding “Everyone has a stylist these days.” Deepika got her own back a few moments later when she told Johar it’s not possible for two actresses in the same league to be friends, by which we actually think she meant that Sonam isn’t in her league at all.

Deepika and Ranbir Are Friends
This we’re definitely not buying. But we’re kind of scared by how committed Deepika is to appearing like she’s taking the high road, insisting that the two are still very much in touch. Ten minutes in though, either Sonam’s gleeful bitchery finally rubbed off on her or she realised the ratings value in taking pot shots, because as the show progressed, Deepika seemed less and less reluctant to bash her philandering ex-boyfriend. “He needs to work on his boyfriend skills,” she sniped, before laughing hysterically when Ranbir speaking on a pre-recorded video clip said Deepika “enriched me as a person”. When Johar asked her to confirm Ranbir’s denial that the cheating boyf she had referenced in an interview was not him, she said “The clarification was not me”, following up with a double whammy of advising Ranbir to endorse a condom brand and ranking him last in terms of sex appeal.

Katrina Kaif Is Old
For calling Katrina Kaif their “senior” with a straight face, both Sonam and Deepika get double bonus points. To recap: Deepika is 24; Sonam is 25 and Katrina is 26.

With Friends Like These, Who Needs Enemies?
If Sonam had any friends before this, she’s most likely going to have none after. To the evident delight of K-Jo’s inner Perez Hilton, Sonam trash talks her way down a long line of Bollywood stars, seeming to find it hysterical that she’s doing it on national TV. There’s nothing to not believe, so in order of who gets the most hatin’:

Shobhaa De: So much for taking the high road. After making it clear in not so many words that the slanty-eyed celeb with the plastic surgery penchant is columnist Shobhaa De, Sonam ripped into her after stating for the record that one of De’s daughters and Sonam’s sister are “best friends”. We’re not sure if the clarification was meant to help her cause, but we’re willing to guess Sonam just torpedoed that relationship. “She writes bad books” Sonam sniffed, before rambling about De’s biased treatment of Ranbir Kapoor.

Ranbir Kapoor: Ah, the poor sod who doth dare insult Ms. Kapoor. Is that a murderous glint we spot in her eye when Ranbir, speaking on the video clip, says that Sonam is melodramatic and that sometimes he just wants to hold her by the neck and tell her to “be real”? Either way, we suggest he hide. Sonam retaliated in kind by giggling hysterically when she said she’s seen him in his birthday suit, probably not the reaction Ranbir was hoping to inspire. When K-Jo asks her who she thinks has the better future, Imran or Ranbir, Sonam, showing what we suspect she thinks is tact, said: “In my head I know who, but I’ll say both”. High praise indeed.

The Rest of Bollywood: It’s like the slaughterhouse massacre except the deranged killer is a giggle-happy ingenue high on herself. From Bollywood style (“they all suck”) and Kangna Ranaut (“could use English lessons”) to Amrita Rao (“needs a stylist”) and Sanjay Leela Bhansali (“could use some colour in his life apart from blue and black”), Sonam is pretty bitch-tastic, sparing no one except Aishwarya Rai Bachchan. She is “totally worth it” according to Sonam, but we’re willing to bet that’s the fear of losing her L’Oreal contract talking. Whoever advised Sonam to count to ten before speaking clearly needs to revise their strategy and perhaps hire a PR handler asap.

Sonam Kapoor: 2/10
Deepika Padukone: 5/10
Karan Johar: 2/10

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Comments (12)

  1. Priyanka |

    By the way, Sonam was being sarcastic about the industry sucking at fashion, and honest about Kangana… She said nice things about Kangana and sounded genuinely apologetic, plus about Amrita, there’s a huge difference in liking someone’s acting/looks and the way they dress… Amrita Rao is a good actress and pretty, but she def needs a stylist!

  2. Priyanka |

    I think it was one of the best, funniest episodes in all of KWK!!! Plastic surgery, rapid-fire, Ranbir Kapoor… It was all incredibly funny! They were both upfront and bold, yet careful not to hurt feelings… They both respect Ranbir OBVIOUSLY to have worked with him and still do; they are still in touch and Deepika has still got the tattoo.
    And Shobha does have a disgusting habit of always getting personal, vicious and bitchy when she writes reviews! She is much too extreme in her opinion and goes way too far in insulting everytime! Deepika said they were friends, but they never claimed to be the best of friends, SISTERS or anything! If they want to rate themselves in order of talent like that, then it was because they are being honest… Priyanka and Kareena are known to be the best actresses in Bollywood!
    And they are right… Shobha De had said, “Sonam doesn’t cut it in the sex appeal stakes.” And that is pretty much the same as what Sonam and Deepika said for Ranbir… He’s cute and a great actor, but he hasn’t got the take-him-home imagine, like Sonam put it…
    To me, it was a refreshing, great episode and there was friendship, warmth and easy excitement, but no hidden bitchiness or undercurrent competition…
    They had a great time on the show, and so did most of the audience watching it!

  3. Angad |

    Deepika was better than sonam. Sonam is the foolest actress in bollywood.

  4. lovekarela |

    What was that comment about Saif? There seems to be a story there.

  5. Annie |

    I think they are beng young girls..

    It is amazing how the kapoor clan has come down hard on the show afterwards – Ranbir Kapoor is a baby or what. Can’t he handle his ex girlfriends like a man should? He sends mummy and daddy t that. That really sucks

  6. Bhavya |

    I liked the show..but i “hated” Sonam’s costume and she was very immature and giggly through out the show!! Deepika looked stunning and I felt she was trying to be careful about what she says all the while!!
    And its about time people start realizing about Shoba De..shes too much and I totally agree with the girls when they said she had no rights about making a remark on the physical features of actors or their personal lives. The one where she compared Deepika with some village girl was very rude. Otherwise, the show is a good time pass =)

  7. Sharon |

    Hypocrisy or not, the girls made the show fun and watchable.. It was light and frothy and honest and made the show fresh. I guess if ranbir cheated on deepika, he will forgive and forget her jabs, especially since in the previous episode on him and imran khan, he seemed to be rather proudly flaunting his peccadilloes as far as multitasking where women are concerned. The best way to deal with it is to maintain a cordial atmosphere and churn out a superduper hit with rockstar which is the only thing that counts. Obviously he shouldn’t trust his exes to exhibit good friendship, but I don’t think he will be too intensely concerned about the whole thing.. That’s part of his laidback charm. And good luck to the girls in boosting their sagging careers.

  8. It was all pure hypocrisy to boost TRPs. The ladies are pretty smart to know that they have to return home to their sagging careers and pleasing Karan Candy Floss Johar, is just the thing……more here:

  9. Samara |

    I agree.. it’s high time someone called shobhaa de a spade- the lady is a pain.
    The episode was high-TRP worthy with all the soundbites coming thru- deepika was classy in appearance but the rk bashing was less so- she carried washing the dirty laundry too far and thanks to sonam, came across as the girl who just can’t let go of ranbir. Sonam couldn’t match deepika in fashion sense and class- but it was delicious to watch her rip people beyond healing with her pretty manicured claws :-)
    What really surprises me though is how Rishi Kapoor has reacted- considering ranbir’s proficiency in cheating on his girlfriends, am sure he can efficiently take care of himself instead of having daddy darling fight his battles for him.
    But honestly, the boy is superhot though.. Delish!

  10. Ritika |

    Poor ranbir.. He was quite a gentleman as far as these ladies were concerned on kwithk show, but the favor was not returned. Obviously it’s no use being friends with ur exes these days!
    Frenemies indeed – but think deepika trumped sonam in the fashion sense on the show, and sk was obviously determined to trash their common enemies- shobhaa de and rk. But it was refreshing to see her be so honest about sd- the lady really needs to retire from her ranting and imposing her frightening face on us aam janta.
    The jibe at katrina’s age was a bad one- she might be older and may not act too well- but these gals are nowhere close to her list of hits or her popularity among men..
    keeping her lips zipped about rk might have been a better idea for deepika’s otherwise classy image, now she just came across as still stewing about his infidelity but not having gotten over him if her comment on not wanting to get out of the elevator with rk and smallya is anything to go by..
    Is it just me or did these two ladies come across as saying ‘sour grapes’ about rk while secretly still wanting him v much and seeming frustrated about katrina kaif’s .. (or is it already nargis fakhri’s?) success with him?
    Fasttrack might have the best advice for the ladies-
    move on! Bigger hits and better love lives will be the best revenge on the charming womanizer.

  11. Twisha |

    i definitely think deepika was WAY better than sonam…sonam was just plain annoying. she could give aishwarya rai a run for her money with her wide smile and unending giggles. i thought the best part of the show is how they slammed shobha de. i thought that was honest and not diplomatic for a change and that was just great. all in all its just a trashy show. entertaining none the less but terribly trashy. also, HATED what sonam was wearing.

  12. Deepanjana |

    Come on, Sonam Kapoor did her best to make the episode refreshing. Surely it’s not trash talk to be truthful, whether or not one likes reading Shobhaa De titles? Because, really, you cannot tell me Kangana R can speak English or that Bollywood dresses well. Case in point, Deepika’s dress that had a random hole in the midriff that made it seem as though Deepika had belly fat.